Don’t just say yes without being sure of what you are getting into.
When you are single, ready and aching for love and a relationship, you may be tempted to settle for anything and anyone that comes along, without considering the serious questions you should be asking or actually giving it enough thought.
While we have already written it here that settling should not be an option for you, no matter how long it’s been or how ready and eager you are to get the man or woman of your dreams.
Particularly when you have been single for a long time, it may be difficult to not go with anyone who shows up and asks to be a part of your life. However, no matter how tempting that offer [or even the person making it] looks, you really have to ask yourself these questions before going into that relationship.
Minister and filmmaker DeVon Franklin, who is popular for his decision with Hollywood actress, Meagan Good, to stay away from sex before their marriage, says these are important questions to consider before agreeing to a relationship with anyone.
1. Are you really ready?
“Sometimes we’re just not ready for it emotionally,” he writes in an email blast titled ‘Reasons Not To Commit.’
“There’s still some work we need to do on ourselves, some personal heavy lifting that demands our focus and sacrifice for a while longer.”
“Reluctance to commit often comes from a deep knowing that it’s just not time,” he wrote. “And that person you’re aching for? If that person is who God has set up for you, he or she will be there when you’re ready.”
“You shouldn’t commit because of pressure or fear that you’re falling behind, either. Don’t rush into a commitment because everybody else is doing it.
The people who pressure us into marriage are often the same ones who ask, ‘Why didn’t it work out?'”
4. For people who are being celibate…
“Another reason to hesitate is because you realize you’ve chosen a person because she or he was willing to wait—and not much else,” he wrote.
“Giving up sex for you is a wonderful thing, but you can’t build a relationship on that alone.”
5. Am I doing this just to please the other person
Finally, the 40-year-old warned couples not to commit to marriage just to make someone else happy.
“You also should never commit because it’s what someone else wants,” he urged. “When you make a decision just to please someone else, you will always make the wrong decision.”
And when the time comes to say yes to a marriage proposal, here are questions to ask yourself, and some more to ask your partner.